In this TED Talk, Cortney Warren shares how understanding ‘self-deception’ is a key to achieving a fulfilling life. Opportunities for change don’t come about without self-awareness.
There are so many ways in which we lie to ourselves. These are shared in an enlightening and light-hearted way throughout this talk. There’s:
- Cognitive distortions
- Emotional reasoning
- Over generalisation
There are the psychological theories of human nature where we lie as self-defence mechanisms, through denial, rationalisation or projection. At times we avoid confronting the realities of life. We lie to ourselves.
And we promote self-deception from a very young age.
So, what can we do about this? How do we start acknowledging the lies that we tell ourselves?
Observing ourselves more closely is one way to do this. When you have a strong emotional reaction to something, or when what you say and what you do don’t align, Cortney encourages us to pause. To ask the question, “what does this say about me?” This can help people more self-aware.
Responsible for our choices
If we can admit that we are insecure about something, then we are confronted with choice. And we become responsible for those decisions. We are always responsible for our reactions to situations, even if we can’t always control those situations.
One of the best ways to confront self-deception is through therapy. But often this is avoided through the stigma associated with it. Cortney highlights that it requires a lot of courage to seek therapy, but it can be one of the most amazing gifts you can give yourself.
Learn more of the detail by watching the full 14-minute TED talk here.
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